Matt left yesterday for a conference in Central IL, so I had to stay home by myself last night. I am not a big fan of being home alone all night long. I am a 22 year old who still thinks there are monsters under her bed! :)
I decided the only way I would sleep well is to stay awake as long as possible, keep busy and then maybe I would crash and wouldn't realize that I was home alone. Seemed like a good plan...I turned the TV on for some background noise and started cleaning. I took a tooth brush to the bath tub and washed 10 loads of laundry (clothes, all the bed linens and decided the towels could use another washing as well). I washed the shower curtain and all of the rugs. Cleaned out the fridge. Organized all of my important folders. Took care of the dust bunnies that had been burrowing themselves in my house. I browned meat for tacos and made a meatloaf to freeze for dinner later this week.
3:30 am rolled around and I finally forced myself to turn off the lights and lay down. Still my mind was racing. I heard a noise and thought for sure someone had finally decided it was time to attack me (I was just sure that they had decided to wait until my house was clean to reveal themselves). Grabbing my cell phone (like that would help) I walked toward the noise ready to pounce. I soon realized that I had gotten all hyped up over a piece of paper being blown around by my fan.
Rushing back under my covers to safety I felt so childish and silly. I just started praying for peace. Then the thought hit me, so what if I had been attacked and killed? I would be in heaven with my Savior! So what was I afraid of? I was afraid of the feeling of fear. Well that is temporary. I was afraid of feeling pain. Again, temporary. I needed to place my faith and life in the One who is eternal! Once that thought had gone through my mind, sleep finally found me...
...the alarm went off this morning way too early. Hadn't I just fallen asleep? Looking in the mirror all I could see were my blood-shot eyes and my brain was too foggy to think about doing anything about it. What a stupid idea to stay up until I crashed! :)
Hopefully Matt will not be delayed by snow and will be home tonight!